Ometepe: You just can't see too many Volcanoes, it's impossible

I spent a few days in Ometepe, an island in lake Nicaragua.
The lake is the largest in Central America, and whilst it isn't as breathtaking as Lake Atitlan in Guatemala, it's quite something to look across a lake that feels more like an ocean, with no sign of the other side even on a clear day.

The lake is also famous for the world's only fresh water sharks (bull sharks, mean fuckers), which had a boom and bust industry built around their wholesale slaughter in the 70s and 80s for their fins, making them practically extinct now.
I kind of wanted to see one, and I asked the woman at the hostel: she said she'd never seen one, but then again she rents Kayaks too, so you can hardly trust that, right? I didn't see any though.

Ometepe is a figure 8, with a volcano at the centre of each circle. When you're in the narrow strip that joins them, you can see a volcano on either side you. And the biggest, concepcion, looks like something from a movie: a subdued green in colour, it has cracks like deep scars, as if saomeone had raked massive claws down it from top to bottom.
The top is usually cloud covered, and it seems to wrap around the peak as if you'd taken the volcano and dipped it in the candy floss vat, letting the cloud floss spin around the top in whispy threads.

The place is also pretty underdeveloped, most of the roads are dirt tracks that turn to slush in the rain, and the buses are generally falling apart: I even saw a woman on the bus with a squirrel on her lap, with a lead of blue string, being fed mango.

Oh, and I was hanging with a Canadian, an Israeli and a Norweigan girl, and was pleasantly surprised when I told the Canadian guy to 'fix up', and he replied "fix up, look sharp! Do you like Dizzy Rascal?"

Adventures in Scuba

I realised I haven´t mentioned anything about all the diving I´ve been doing, so here´s a summary.

I didn´t take any of the pics I´m afraid, but they´re all of the right species or from the same dive site.

MEXICO

I couldn´t remember anything about the equipment, but being under water is like riding a bike to me, it comes back real quick.

I was diving with noobies on the team tho, so the comparison was bound to make me look good...



Saw a nurse shark, and loads of massive turtles, which are so chill, you just swim right by them, and drift along for a while...


BELIZE

The Blue Hole is a legendary trophy dive, and wasn´t cheap, and the dive masters were completely unprofessional.
You´re not supposed to dive below 20 metres as an entry level diver, and this dive was 40m... and they didn´t even ask about it!

It was like a 2 stage dive, first stop around 20m, then onto the 40m.
The second I got in the water I saw nothing but sharks; nurse sharks and reef sharks.

We descended to the 40m, which we can only stay at for about 8 mins, and once my eyes adjusted to the light, you could make out the creepy stalectites in the caves down there.



We ascended again for the 5 min safety stop, and were surrounded by the sharks again.
Quite intimidating when they head straight for you, believe!


HONDURAS


I did like seven dives in Honduras, including two night dives, which are awesome...
The torch lights cut through the darkness like scenes from a movie, and the whole thing has a kind of cinematic feel... I saw an octopus, which changed colours from orangey red to vibrant blue, a lobster, a hermit crab, shrimp...

We sat on the bottom and turned off the lights, and there were so many fish they were literally bumping into us in the dark, and we could see the phosphoresence sparkling like crazy fireworks in the water, and then we surfaced to have them replaced by the stars, real clear and vivid... and we swam back to the boat, feeling like we´d seen something fucking magic.


I also saw some Speckled eagle rays (see the pic), which are so smooth and graceful in the water, I would have done anything to followém, no matter how deep they went, or for how long...

So there you go. If I do any more, I´ll add em to this post... apparently you can dive the panama canal, which might be cool! We´ll see...

Progresso, aka The yoof, part II...

DAY 1

In Guatemala I met some guys from who work in Honduras, helping underpriviledged kids in orphanages around Progresso, Honduras. Justin is from the states, but is originally Bolivian, and Nima is form Sweden, but originally from Iran... crazy combos, eh?
They said I could visit any time... I´m glad they meant it, cos I did!

They picked me up from the bus station, and I can´t tell you how nice it is to arrive somewhere with friends waiting for you, instead of flying blind, being assualted by taxi drivers.

They drive an SUV, as does anyone whos anyone in Honduras... the place is a sharp contrast to Guatemala, it seems to want to be the US, wheras Guatemala seems happy with its mix of cultures.

We stopped at a gas station, and as Justin went to pay, a woman in another SUV started talking to him. She was behind the wheel, swigging from a beer, which is such an alien thing to see in a gas station that it jarred as much as almost anything I´ve seen so far. They then followed us back to Progresso, veering and swerving wildly on the freeway, and we laughed at them like idiots, shocked that we were being followed by three drunk women.

That evening, free of our stalkers, we cycled to the basketball court, and I sweated like a bitch while practicing my lay ups. Taking a break with a bag of water (cheap water comes in little plastic bags that you squeeze it out from like a bladder), the place seemed alive with the sound of balls hitting wood, and the open slats for windows gave glimpses of the neon fast food signs, burger king and wendys glittering like stars.
For the first time, I didn´t feel like a tourist one bit.

We cycled to a street cafe, and I tried to join in the Spanish conversations, whilst stuffing my face with street burrito things.

When we get back we find a girl waiting: not a drunk stalker, but a 16 year old they work with who got chucked out of home, and needed somewhere to stay.
They set her up, then Justin and Nim chat together: their office is their home, and they´re effectively on call 24/7, with no privacy.
Listening to them talk, it was kinda weird: these are not the kinds of people who I imagined doing this kind of work, I expect loads of crusty hippies, or idealistic bleeding hearts. These are just two guys, guys who shoot the shit, take the piss out of stuff, cruise around town in the SUV listening to Hip Hop, tell the kids they have cool scars (Justin:"Who gave you it?" kid:"My Dad" Justin:"He got you good, huh?" kid:"yeah, then I stabbed him") ; guys who wear ´pimp daddy´ T-shirts ("just in case they forget").If these are what volunteer organisations can be, I can see myself fitting in a lot more than I´d imagined.

DAY 2

Driving to the orphanage we cross the railroad tracks, and the phrase seems like it was born here... within seconds the only houses are corrugated iron shacks.

At the orphanage, we realise we've been beaten to the punch.. .a group of fat American women are here, preachng about Jesus to kids that are ex glue addicts from the street. I'm sure they really feel Gods love. This is apparently rare, but I love the image of my guys flooring the SUV, trying to get to orphanages before the God squad.

The kids here range from 7 to 15, and someone points out one of the older kids: "I'd like to beat the shit out of that kid man, he sexually abuses the little ones, like, some kids have escaped just cos they're afraid of him."
A part of me thinks of the cycle of abuse, that he must be repeating what happened to him as a kid... but my heart doesn't bleed much, I think I agree: If only the Punisher would spend a few days at these places, he'd separate the wheat from the chaff. (If you don't know who the Punisher is, fix up).
THe standard greeting here is like a mini high five hand slap, followed by a touch (I´m gonna keep it when I get back home) and I was doing it with all the kids that I met, and one kid comes up tome and I´m starting it before I realise he weas born with one arm ending just after the
elbow. Neither of us was phased however, I slap on his stump and do the touch on his elbow. He turned out to be pretty good in goal.
We walk around the orphanage: they have a monkey in a small cage here, going slowly out of its mind. The parallels are too obvious to spell out.


In the afternoon we visit a place for kids with downs syndrome and other learning difficulties, or whatever you fricking say. Personal space is a novel concept to these kids, and with my British reserve it took me a while to get used too.

In the evening I watched TV, and fought for the remote control with the girl who moved in the day before, who watched nothing but MTV. My Spanish and comfort level was high enough to mock her appauling taste in music.


DAY 3

Back to the ex glue sniffers again, playing football. One of the gits called a hand ball on me when it glanced off the top of my shoulder, like we're so fucking professional we're gonna bring out the off side flag any minute, but I get a look like "these kids will probably throw a brick at you if you say anything," so I let it slide.

I was sweating like an animal.
Progreso is hot, possibly the hottest place I´ve been in my life. You need to shower three times a day (No private shower, so I couldn´t) and to change your sweaty underwear three times too (not enough laundry, so I didn´t).
The only respite was the smoothie place near where I was staying, air con and awesome smoothies were absolute bliss.
We lounged watching TV till it was cool enough to think again.

It was Friday, so Nim's girlfriend and some other Hondurans they hang with came.
One of the Honduran girls had been to England.
"I ws volunteering in England."
"Where?"
"East Grinstead"
"Er..."
What do you say to that? Bad luck?

We all went for food, and it was so cool to be involved in conversations that didn´t start with "where you from, how long have you been travelling..." And the constant, fluid shifting from English to Spanish, with me understanding most of the Spanish too, was fun.

It felt like I was part of a real group of people, not just transients, who had more in common than their choice of Hostel and travel destinations. It was cool. And I get to feel like I helped the yoof.